Relationships can be challenging; sometimes, one of the two partners asks for a break. This can shock many people, especially if they aren’t aware something is going wrong. However, when these things happen, you have to navigate these uncharted waters.
So is your relationship over now that your girlfriend wants a break? Read on to find out!
Why Does Your Girlfriend Want a Break?
If your girlfriend says she needs a break from your relationship, knowing the reason behind this request can be very helpful. Although some partners will try to eschew the confrontation necessary to know the reason, some might be open and honest about it. So let’s go over the possible reasons:
She Feels Smothered
One of the most common reasons people ask for a break in relationships is the feeling of suffocation that comes with long-term commitment. Feeling smothered or stifled by the other partner’s constant presence can cause some people to retreat.
This can happen if your girlfriend suffers from a dismissive-avoidant style of attachment.
Your Behaviors Annoy Her
Let’s face it, nobody’s perfect. This can be especially obvious if you move in together and she gets annoyed by some of your behaviors. It could be as simple as leaving the lights on or not putting away your socks after you take them off, but these add up and can cause some chaos.
Your Relationship Lost Its Spark
After a while of being together, you run the risk of losing the spark that started the relationship in the first place. Intimacy doesn’t feel special anymore, or feels like something you get over with.
This can cause dissatisfaction with the relationship and may cause your girlfriend to ask for a break.
She Feels Lonely
Unlike the first problem, this problem arises when your girlfriend feels like she doesn’t get enough affection or attention in your relationship. This can lead to feelings of loneliness and anxiety over the relationship’s future, and some people choose to deal with it by asking for a break.
There’s Someone New
Unfortunately, sometimes the reason someone wants a break is to figure out some feelings towards someone else. This is a mature way to handle the situation and avoid cheating on their significant other, all while trying to work through the feelings they might be experiencing.
How to Handle the Situation When Your Girlfriend Wants a Break
Depending on the state of your relationship, hearing the words come out of your girlfriend’s mouth can be shocking, devastating, or not at all surprising. That said, handling the situation requires a lot of patience, grace, and understanding.
Understand It’s Not the End
Asking for a break isn’t the same as asking to break up. Breaks are temporary in nature, and depending on the reason behind them, they can be beneficial to your relationship.
Don’t let that request engage your fight-or-flight response. Listen well and be rational.
Agree to the Break
No matter what your feelings are when your girlfriend asks for a break, you should honor her request. Begging or coercing her to drop her request won’t do the situation any favors. In fact, these behaviors might push her further away and make her feel more alienated.
Allow for Open Communication
One reason why your girlfriend might ask for a break is a lack of communication. Talk things out with her, ask her why she thinks a break is necessary, and maybe lay some ground rules for the break duration so no one’s feelings get hurt.
Avoid harsh language and accusations. These could do much more damage to the relationship than any break ever could!
Let her know she can contact you any time she wants, since some people get shy or awkward about reaching out when they were the ones who initiated the break.
Work on Yourself
Spending the time of the break understanding more about yourself and your relationship can benefit you tremendously. This is true should you and your girlfriend decide to stay together or go your separate ways.
Finding more about your vulnerabilities, triggers, strengths, and interests can make the relationship’s flaws more tangible to you. Working with a therapist is highly recommended.
To Wrap Up
If your girlfriend wants a break, this doesn’t always mean your relationship is over. Many reasons such as feeling smothered, lonely, annoyed, or not that passionate about the relationship might lead to such a request
Handling the situation with grace and an open heart can make the break beneficial for both of you. A break is a great time to figure yourself out, especially if you’ve been in a long-term relationship for a long time!