Never Force Anyone to Talk to You: Why and What to Do Instead?

by Rosemarie Hardison
never force anyone to talk to you

People generally don’t enjoy being forced to talk to anyone. Moving someone to speak to you makes them less likely to listen to you. So, if it did happen once, don’t let there be a next time.

Never force anyone to talk to you again, and here are 10 reasons why:

10 Reasons Why You Should Never Force Anyone to Talk to You

Here’s why it’s a bad idea:

1.    The Conversation Will Be Unproductive Because It’s One-Sided

All kinds of relationships are two-way streets. If only one side is making an effort, you can never keep it going.

A conversation is the same. If the other person isn’t responding, you will never get anywhere. Thus, when you realize it’s going to be an unproductive conversation, just end it and continue.

2.    You Could Be Invading Their Privacy

Some people simply refuse to talk. Perhaps you’re discussing something personal with them, and they’re not very open to you yet.

You can either change the topic or let them start the conversation. Forcing them to talk isn’t a good option.

3.    It Can Harm Your Self-Esteem and Confidence

We’ve all had that kind of experience at least once in our lives. We send a message to someone, but we’re left seen, or ignored and don’t receive a reply.

Sometimes, we’d keep sending more messages to get their attention, but to no avail.

This could lead to us feeling rejected. Worse, we might not even initiate to approach anyone anymore to avoid this feeling.

Unfortunately, the feeling of rejection may increase substantially if the person ignoring you is directly in front of you and not behind a screen.

4.    They Need Space

Some people just need space. Maybe to gather their thoughts or to think of how to respond to a certain situation.

Whatever the case, forcing them to talk to you won’t yield much. The best approach would be to give them the necessary space and time.

Eventually, they’ll be ready to speak to you again and have a healthy talk with you.

5.    You Might Seem Clingy and Desperate

When we’re too enthusiastic to talk to someone, we tend to talk nonstop and cling to them. At times, we get a bit insensitive and don’t feel that they’re not interested.

We’ll end up appearing clingy and desperate for their attention, which doesn’t exactly have a good effect on our image.

Also, if you persist, they may become annoyed and may stop responding.

6.    Forcing Someone to Talk Is Also a Form of Emotional Abuse

never force anyone to talk to you

We don’t always realize it. But in reality, when we’re too caught up with forcing someone to talk to us, we end up trying many things to get them to talk.

As a result, we become too controlling and manipulative. That means we’re subjecting them to emotional abuse, which isn’t healthy.

So, you’re no longer oblivious now that you have heard of this possibility. It would be best that you practice awareness and avoid being manipulative.

The worst thing about it is that we don’t feel it when we’re being manipulative until it’s too late.

7.    You’re Wasting Time and Energy

The time and energy we pour into forcing someone to talk when they don’t want to are wasted.

If we see how they aren’t that thrilled to be giving us even a bit of their time, it should be a sign to let go of the conversation. Any extra effort at this point will be in vain.

8.    You Might Be Bothering Them

People could be occupied with work, chores, and other duties. It could also be that they’re discussing something important to someone. Either way, it might be that you’re bothering them.

Give them some time to finish their tasks or conversation. They’ll get back to you once they’re done.

9.    Understand Their Point of View

Have you ever had a conversation with someone who seemed totally uninterested in speaking to you?

Maybe they didn’t even look at you when you spoke. Or maybe they looked away from you when you talked. In either case, you probably felt rejected.

However, how about we put ourselves in their shoes? If you’ve ever had someone force you to talk, then you know how uncomfortable it feels.

It’s important to think for a second and ask yourself why someone would refuse to talk. Feeling rejected or unwanted at the moment could be annoying, but it’s because we often place the spotlight on ourselves only.

If you manage to overcome that feeling of rejection and look beyond, you’ll often realize that the other person doesn’t dislike you; they’re just having a mind-occupying issue at the time.


In a nutshell, you should never force anyone to talk to you. We must value our worth and know when to avoid the conversation.

Not everyone will want to talk to us, but many others will be willing to! So let them come to you, and listen to them, too.

Let’s surround ourselves with people who make an effort to maintain our relationship. Most of all, appreciate the time they give us by returning what they deserve!

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